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Feedback: Your Concerns About Open Relationships

Updated: Nov 13, 2019

Gay open relationships are a really difficult topic for many couples. Clearly, an open relationship is right for some couples, and not right for others. Given so much pain caused by this topic (see below) we're putting together a web seminar series for you.

In preparation for our seminar series on this topic, we conducted a survey of your major concerns. Here's what you told us:

1. Is this right for me?...

  • "My top fear is that my boyfriend wants to have an open relationship and I don't want this. I'm trying to be "relaxed" but any time I think about him with another I feel just terrible."

2. How do you maintain emotional monogamy:

  • Is the key to open relationships to hold onto a sense of emotional monogamy with your committed partner and allowing the additional partners to be respectful playmates?

  • Can one remain emotionally faithful to your partner while sleeping with other people?

3. How do you establish rules around this issue?...

  • "Rules about what is/is not off limits (no friends, no repeats, no ex's?)"

  • "What are the alternatives to an open relationship? Is it the only alternative to sexual boredom that's out there and if not what else is on the menu?"

  • "Is it a "natural" progression for gay relationships?"

  • "How can you "close" your open relationship if it turns out that this arrangement doesn't work for you"

Do you have any opinions on this issue? Give us a comment below if so.